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But there are guys who can't do what is necessary, even if they DO understand -- they've been brought up to think it is wrong to provide what we need." What do you need?" I asked."Control. Supervision. Attention -- not the type you might think, but vigilance, maybe. You have to be able to understand that by taking, you give -- because you give us the opportunity TO give. Where you might think that anything you get from us is gravy and that if we don't give you something, it's no big thing because of what we DO give, the correct thing to do is to jump on us and have a fit because we're not giving one hundred percent. When you're paying attention and making demands and challenging us, then we know we're wanted and valued. Taking it easy on us, while it might seem to be the right thing, isn't -- we're going to think you're ignoring us, and we'll act up to see if you really are or not. If you catch us acting up, then the correct thing is to punish us -- which again sounds weird, maybe,. "I need to tell you something and I think you need to know this." Inodded at her, unsure of what she was about to say. "You didn't knowthis, but when I was carrying you everyone thought you were going to be agirl. Your grandmother said she just knew it by how I was carrying you,the OBG-YN with his ultrasound, even I just knew you were going to be agirl. We were so surprised when you were born, we had prepared for adaughter and now we had a son. I wanted you to know I love you just asmuch as a daughter as I ever loved you as a son. Maybe even more so, witheverything you have had to overcome. I'm glad you're my daughter baby,always remember that okay."I just sat up and hugged her. "Mom I am so sorry for making you all worryso much and that I wish I had let you know everything from the start. Ilove you so much Mom," We sat there and both of us let a few tears flowwith her rocking me, finally I had to know so I asked her, "I've beentrying to think of a name for when I can't really keep.
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